You are doing a PhD??? BUT WHY!!!!!!!!!

Someone recently uttered the title of this blog and it 'knocked' me into the real world where people give you strange looks if you are doing a PhD. The entire span of my doctoral study can be summed up chronologically by three nouns; idealism, realism, antagonism and, God forbid, for some people the list can be extended with alcoholism and zombiism!!

I can write pages and pages about my or anyone else's PhD experience but the apt lines were uttered by my advisor. He once said, "Finishing your doctoral study is like a sexual climax, when everything starts to happen at the same time", and I honorably add, "with the only difference being that you would love to go through a sexual climax time and again but never ever dare to 'finish another PhD' !!!!!!"

As a dedication to my doctoral 'climax', I am listing a few satirical as well as some good lines that I came across during these 5 years of graduate study;

1] First my favorite: "You are doing a PhD??? BUT WHY!!!!!!!!!"
2] PhD = Permanent Head Damage
3] BS => Bull S***; MS => More S***;PhD => Pile it Higher and Deeper
4] PhD = Poor Hungry Doctorate student
5] "Breach what you preach"
6] "Women make possible impossible"
7] "Either you should know the solution or know someone who knows the solution"
8] "The laws of physics do not stop working during the weekends" (there goes my weekend!)
9] Experiments work by Black Magic
10] Outcome of an experiment depends on the frequency of rotation of a pulsar in some distant galaxy
11] Lab equipments are distant cousins of Marvin (the severely depressed paranoid android with GPP in novel/movie 'The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy'. The picture in this blog post is that of Marvin taken from Wikipedia)
12] PhD = reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-search (search again n again n again ....)
13] An experiment is as good as its instrumentation and a simulation is as good as its assumptions
14] "Let us get to the hurdle then think about it" (very useful most of the times)
15] When I say,"Hi, I am doing a PhD", the replies........
"ooooooooohhh"
"OHHHHHHHHH"
"hooooooo ha ha ha, now I can say that I have a mad scientist as a friend"
"Oh you must be a genious, I wish I could do that" (OFCOURSEEEEEEEE nobody means it)
"Acknowledge me when you get a Nobel prize"
"Why don't you advice my son/daughter"
"Your life is set, you will have no problems" (yeah RIGHT !!!!!)